Saying Goodbye

I think that everyone can relate to the feeling one gets when we see our heart horse for the first time. The feelings of joy and also the feeling of expectation and future adventures waiting right around the corner.

The thing that we cannot begin to even imagine are the feelings of loss and grief when we lose our equine partner.

The process of living with grief is one we are familiar with. By the time we reach middle age most of us have lost a parent, a friend or other relative. We know the steps we will go through and realize that it will pass, not hurt any less but, move us along to a point where we can feel like we can revisit moments and places and not be utterly struck immobile with devestating loss of our loved one.

A lot of us over the course of our lives have lost a pet. A cat, a bird, a dog. We sometimes move on and over time are able to open our hearts to another pet. With horses it’s a different story. We know just how strong our bond is with our horse, we know just how many hours, days, weeks, years, it took to build that house of trust; moving along to another horse is a journey that is scary and daunting and sometimes impossible.

We lost my husbands horse this past spring. I’m not going to lie, it was rough. He’d been sick for a few weeks, confined to his stall. He couldn’t walk without being in excrutiating pain. We worked with two local Vets to try and figure out how to help him but, pain relief seemed the only answer. I even called two other Vets in Edmonton to see if they could shine a light on the mystery illness. The feeling of helplessness, the feeling of knowing that despite all our efforts just how things would finally end was aweful.

It’s been a few months now; the thoughts we have of Trigger even so always there are less painful. We can move through our days without feeling or thinking – if only he were here. We think about the good times we had with him and the funny things he would do. We think about the times he would play so patiently with our youngster Glitnir – teaching him how to be a well manered boy. Our Trigger was such a good horse, he will be missed and loved always by all who knew him. RIP – Threat’s Trigger Happy – L.

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